Emptiness, shattered dreams, anger, fear.... that's how I've felt for the last 24 hours.
I'll start way back.
No period in October, late period in November.
Major pelvic pain in October- discovery: cervical infection. Treatment: 10 days of antibiotics.
October: nausea, vomiting, smells making me ill, a *bump* in the belly (nobody else noticed, but I saw me naked- so I did) I just *knew* something was different.
OBGYN appt yesterday: Positive pee test.
Ultrasound: Nothing. Uterus, a piece of shit. Swollen, can't keep a pregnancy piece of crap uterus.
Left with a script for an antibiotic (b/c of swollen uterus and I guess when you m/c they sometimes put you on an antibio) and diflucan in case it gives me a yeast infection. Wait to lose 'baby'.
Last Night: grief, sadness, pain (physically, emotionally)
This Morning: Woke up with pelvic pain. Pushed through it. Got Parker to his school. Went to bathroom b/c I felt something "down there". Sharp pains, big goopy, clumpy blood. Pain. Tears and pain. And, 1 broken hearted Mother who hurts. And I wanted to scoop it up and put it back in my sucky uterus and tell it to stick!
Suzanne's Baptism 1992
-
Linda Anderson sent Suzanne this picture of the family on her baptism day
on February 15, 1992.
[image: Share/Save/Bookmark]
4 months ago
Oh, Jess....sweet girl...hang in there, honey. I had no idea.....my prayers are with you..
ReplyDeleteLove you
Oh hun, I am so sorry to hear about this. I am praying for you and thinking of you. Keep us posted please.
ReplyDeleteOh sweet girl!
ReplyDeleteMy heart is hurting for you!
I am so sorry for your loss.
i will certainly keep you in my prayers!!
Oh Jess! I'm so sorry! Big hugs! Love ya!
ReplyDeleteOh Jess... My heart hurts for you. I am thinking about you and praying for you.
ReplyDeleteBig cyber hugs
So sorry to hear about your loss. Will keep you in my prayers...
ReplyDeleteOh Jess...I'm so sorry. Your post brought tears to my eyes. My thoughts and prayers are with you.
ReplyDeleteOh Jess, I'm so sorry. Rough week just doesn't seem to do justice to how things are going for you. You'll be in my prayers.
ReplyDeleteIf my arms could reach up the miles I would hug you...yucky uterus and all.
ReplyDeleteJess,
ReplyDeleteI am so sorry! I am sending BIG hugs and many prayers your way...I cannot imagine your pain...
I'm so sorry
ReplyDeleteAww, honey, I'm so sorry. I've not kept up on this very well, so I'm just now reading this. Hugs! I can't say I know how you feel, really. But I hope you're doing okay. Love you.
ReplyDelete