Splendid Mayhem: Gettin' Older

Welcome To Holland

I am often asked to describe the experience of raising a child with a disability - to try to help people who have not shared that unique experience to understand it, to imagine how it would feel. It's like this......
When you're going to have a baby, it's like planning a fabulous vacation trip - to Italy. You buy a bunch of guide books and make your wonderful plans. The Coliseum. The Michelangelo David. The gondolas in Venice. You may learn some handy phrases in Italian. It's all very exciting.
After months of eager anticipation, the day finally arrives. You pack your bags and off you go. Several hours later, the plane lands. The stewardess comes in and says, "Welcome to Holland."
"Holland?!?" you say. "What do you mean Holland?? I signed up for Italy! I'm supposed to be in Italy. All my life I've dreamed of going to Italy."
But there's been a change in the flight plan. They've landed in Holland and there you must stay.
The important thing is that they haven't taken you to a horrible, disgusting, filthy place, full of pestilence, famine and disease. It's just a different place.
So you must go out and buy new guide books. And you must learn a whole new language. And you will meet a whole new group of people you would never have met.
It's just a different place. It's slower-paced than Italy, less flashy than Italy. But after you've been there for a while and you catch your breath, you look around.... and you begin to notice that Holland has windmills....and Holland has tulips. Holland even has Rembrandts.
But everyone you know is busy coming and going from Italy... and they're all bragging about what a wonderful time they had there. And for the rest of your life, you will say "Yes, that's where I was supposed to go. That's what I had planned."
And the pain of that will never, ever, ever, ever go away... because the loss of that dream is a very very significant loss.
But... if you spend your life mourning the fact that you didn't get to Italy, you may never be free to enjoy the very special, the very lovely things ... about Holland.

Tuesday, January 22, 2008

Gettin' Older

Some of you that read this are going to laugh at me. That's ok. I just had a realization this morning. - I'm getting older. My mom said something over the weekend about me turning 24 this year. I'm already 23, when did this happen? I'm stuck at me being 20. Next year, I'll be half way to 50. My middle-baby sister will be 17 this year. I still picture her being 6 years old. My baby-baby sister will be 13! WOW. Time flies.... especially when you become a mother and forget about your own birthday... As for the picture above, I feel like that today :) I did a *small* workout last night, and am very sore this morning. I used to beable to do the spilts 4 years ago.... Now, I'd fall over in pain if I tried. Hmm... my *old* self should do those stretches again this morning. I've been thinking about joining a gym. Maybe I should think on that a little harder. They do have free child care and tanning. Since, I'm adicted to tanning- might not be a bad idea ;)

Hope you all have a wonderful Tuesday!

5 comments:

DawnJanuary 22, 2008 at 10:04 AM
Laugh at you? How about kill you! Make us 29yo's feel like dinosaurs! LOL. Sorry you are sore today, wah wah wah. ;)
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* ~ *Jessica* ~ *January 22, 2008 at 11:35 AM
It must be the Mom in me that makes me feel old :)Dawn~ You DON'T look like a dinosaur!!!
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AnonymousJanuary 22, 2008 at 12:13 PM
BOO-FRICKIN-HOO!!! ;) Cry me a river......this coming from a 30-somethin'!!!
You know I love you, old lady!!!!
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DawnJanuary 22, 2008 at 1:00 PM
But oh do I feel like a dinosaur someday's. Thanks for the compliment.

Hi Melissa!
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MelindaJanuary 23, 2008 at 2:18 AM
No, no tanning! Bad! Bad! You'll age before your time! Just kidding. I'm just jealous because my body absolutely refuses to retain any pigment whatsoever. Anyway, about feeling old...TELL ME ABOUT IT! I keep treating my sister like she's still 12 years old! It ticks her off, but I can't help it..to me, she still is. And my brother? He's still a little 8 year old ankle biter, as far as I'm concerned! There is NO WAY they are both all grown up! There is NO WAY I am really almost 25!
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